One day President Trump decided that his picture should be on all
US postage stamps, and issued a detailed executive order.

It specified that the finest paper, inks, adhesives, and printing methods
were to be used. The President personally chose several flattering
engravings of himself to be reproduced on the stamps, with an
American flag fluttering proudly in the background.

A few weeks later, he asked for a report on how the public liked
the new stamps, and sat back in his chair while Vice President
Mike Pence briefed him.

"Mr President," he said, "I'm afraid the new stamps turned out to be
impractical because they won’t stay glued to the envelopes."

Trump became very angry, and demanded to know
why the stamps hadn’t been a huge success.

Pence fidgeted a bit before telling him, "Well, Mr. President, it
seems that people keep spitting on the wrong side of the stamps."

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